What if my problems aren’t that big?
This is a question I’ve heard client’s who have experienced relational trauma ask when they begin therapy. You may also feel a sense that your problems are “silly” or “not that big of a deal” and that “those other people have it much worse than I do”.
Let me stop you right there.
I get that mentality. It comes from a chronic belief that you’re not enough and that it’s “selfish” of you to explore your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. The “my problems aren’t that big” message may have come from early experiences, where caregivers encouraged you to prioritize the needs of others (be it a sibling, a parent, grandparent, or peer), or in some way taught you to minimize your needs.
In therapy, I am going to gently challenge you to take a look at the validity of those beliefs that keep you feeling small and insignificant and help you rewrite them to fit what you want for yourself.
I don’t believe any problem is too small to give caring attention to and I really encourage you to consider where this belief is coming from!
What can i expect in therapy with you?
I find so much value in honoring and cultivating a strong therapeutic alliance with you. It’s so important that you feel safe with me as you’re courageously sharing your story in session. As we’re talking, I will gently encourage you to bring some awareness to any anxiety (or any distressing feeling) you’re experiencing and how it’s manifesting in your body so that over time you can effectively intervene to reduce its effects.
I find that bringing this type of awareness into the room can be so enriching for both of us and can be an opportunity to explore the reactions or feelings that you’re having and help make sense of them together.
You’ll find that I attune to your energy and pay loving attention to the nonverbal cues and verbal responses you give throughout our session. I do this in a collaborative way and will work with whatever is coming up in you. I will always be respectful of your boundaries and will do my best to make sure that your will and consent to explore deeper are operating.
The thing I love about this type of work is that it’s very fluid! There’s no right or wrong way to do this and ultimately I find that therapy is about fostering a sense of connection and mutual respect that allows us to dive in deeply and safely.
How Do I find the right therapist?
What is online therapy like?
HOW DO I set up a session?
It’s hard to know if you’re going to work well with someone or not. Doing your research and going with your gut takes some time and persistence! I never try to convince people to work with me simply because they reached out. I will help you check in with yourself to see if we feel like a right fit! It’s so important to have this decision come from you, which is why I offer a free 20 minute consultation to determine if we’re a good fit for each other!
Love this question! Before I knew what online therapy was all about, I used to think of it as a sort of “second rate” form of therapy. Boy, was I wrong! Not only is online therapy effective, it’s actually incredibly efficient, confidential, and flexible to meet the needs of people with different schedules and commitments.
Some studies are showing that online therapy can be more effective than in-person therapy, since many clients are meeting their therapists from their own home, in comfy clothes, and in a safe and familiar environment. This is not to say that in-person therapy is ineffective, rather it’s considering that online therapy is as equally safe and effective.
Basically, online therapy looks like this: You get home from work, throw on some comfy clothes, grab some water or tea, turn on your computer and click the link that I sent you. Then, you’ll go to the “virtual office”, do a quick mic and audio check, and jump right in!
It’s so easy! You can go about it two ways: Call or email me. If you choose to call, you may be routed to my voicemail, but I do my very best to call folks back within 24-48 hours. I check my messages (both voice and email) daily, so I’ll follow up with you in whichever way you prefer.